The Presencing phase can be a bumpy ride as is beautifully expressed graphically by Kelvy Bird. Staying with your emotions without acting is the way to go. Emotions give energy and as soon as you act them out your discomfort might be gone but the energy as well. Better (try to) wait until you know how to move on.
I’ve been holding quite a few emotions these days and dared to hold them. Some of my insights:
– Jim Marsden gave a great perspective upon the development of Self and your Work. Theory U means a personal transition. If you go through the U you get out of it as somebody else. At least you start to see who you could become. Your insights of your Work have to do with that new person. You have to take care not to do your new Work and to fall back in the person you’ve been. His key question is “How can you nurture that new Self so that you don’t fall back to the small self?”
– Another one of his: all of our life we live in contexts that are being ‘forced’ upon us (family, school, university, work. During a solo retreat of several days your context is gone and you are going to build one for yourself. You come into touch what is really important for you. You need to stay in tune with that deeper intention. How it manifests itself in the world is less important. Might be disapppointing but as long as your intention is clear you ahve the energy to go on.
– Wibo Koole shared the RAIN concept from Mindfulness with me: Recognition of your experiences, Accept them, Inquire into and Non-Identification. The inquiry works best if you do that in a dialogic form is my experience. Check ins during a workshop work well to inquire into your experiences.
– IDEO had difficulty to explain how they had moved on after the movie from the nineties of their process. We did a nice sensing journey in the subway and they had some great suggestions that trigger to look beyond the obvious (look for what people care about, look for things and qualities that prompt behaviour, look for workarounds and adaptations, look for errors and why they make sense). The left part of the U they call: looking for inspiation and I think that is often indeed the result of the left part. But that happens only if you’re attending differently.
– I revisited the way of meditation that Arthur Zajonc proposes and that worked out very well for me. Take a deep dive into something is the first part of the meditation and then let it completely go and see what emerges.
– Social Presencing Theatre worked out in a strange way: I ended up as playing a baby with flask and hat. I didn’t prepare or even attend in the preparation because I thought I’m a baby and I’ll be schlepped around so why bother. Asssuming that I would have a minor role I found myself in the middle of the attention. A baby as big as me looked a bit ‘vulgar’, I was told afterwards.
– I hired a bike and that gave me a great sense of freedom. Was nice to notice.
– I’ve got a wonderful coaching group with whom it’s great to share my deeper and darker emotions. Their support makes it possible to deepen my experience. I am looking forward to our next call…